So you think it’s time?
I am asking you just to make sure you know what you’re in for and how your life will change. But if you have already made up your mind, don’t let me stop you just start enjoying the incredible journey. I am not trying to sound mean in anyway but I hope you have answered all the questions to yourself before proceeding into motherhood. If haven’t, here are questions to ask yourself before having a baby.
Am I ready?
You’re probably thinking of course am ready, but I mean ready emotionally, physically and mentally for yourself and not ready just because your parents, in-laws and friends are. You need to be deciding this at your own terms and not because you have pressure from family to have a baby. Emotionally, you are going to have melt downs and lots of changes occurring and also physically are you ready for you to see your body changing, and be okay with that, If you know you have figured that part out, then you are one decision to check off.
Am I financially ready?
The money aspect is always a touchy subject but has to be dealt with, being ready financially doesn’t mean you have to have hundreds of thousands in the bank for you to have a baby, it just means that you have a bit extra to buy the necessities before the baby arrives and also during your pregnancy, you might need to spend extra costs which you never knew would show up. This is usually up for debate whereby most women may say that having a baby is expensive but it doesn’t have to be. If you can be able to forego the bassinet for a stroller and compromise when it comes to the new baby gadgets out there that make mothers want to buy everything, then you will be fine. So if you have decided to have a baby, only stick with the necessities.
Do I have a support system?
Having a baby is not an easy task and you need to ask yourself this question because you will need support from family and friends. If you don’t get along with them, I suggest you start baking some cookies and drop of a bottle of wine once in a while because you will need some help. I mean If you are with your husband you might say that’s enough support but this is all about what YOU would ask yourself.
During and after the pregnancy, you need a support system to be around to talk to and help you around when you just need ten minutes to yourself and not have to think whether you should be breastfeeding or not. When I had my son, I was alone in a foreign country and as much as I got through it, I really wished I could have some extra support. Make sure you have someone there to be able to support you once in a while. Read about postpartum depression here.
What about disabilities?
We always pray and wish for the best during and after pregnancy, but you can never know, are you ready to deal with a situation when you’re told something is wrong with your child? This is all where all the above comes to question, mentally ready, emotionally, support system and how would you deal with it. I am not saying anything is going to happen but we have to talk about it and as much as every parent wishes for the best, things happen and everyone finds a way to recover from it.
Am I willing to give up my time?
Babies require a lot of attention and you will have to adjust to that by knowing that you will not have as much free time as you did before. You will have to be okay with not getting time to do stuff you used to do when you had no baby and try to figure out how to use your time. So you can start forgetting about girls’ night outs and partying for a while or until you have adjusted to the life with a newborn.
Will I need childcare?
Depending on whether or not you are going to go back to work after the baby is born is also something to think about, and ask yourself if you are willing to get childcare for the duration of time you will be at work, If you decide you want childcare, you need to make sure you are able to pay for that and that’s where being financially ready comes in, so you see that having a child is a wonderful time in a woman’s life but before it happens, you need to have really thought about it and be happy with your answers.
What if I have a baby before asking myself these questions?
Yes it happens, and as much as it can be the last thing you ever thought of, I am just going to tell you that it’s not the end of the world and that women are strong and have been doing this for a long time just calm down, get some advice and know that you will manage one way or another and you will learn from your mistakes and know to be careful next time.
What did you think?
I hope I have been able to give you some of the questions to ask yourself before having a baby and if you are ready, I wish you all the best for you and your little one. For more posts about children, see here and here. If you have any questions or anything to add to this, please feel free to comment below.
83 Comments
This is really good! I’ve been broody for so long so it’s good to read this and put it in to perspective!
Thank you I am glad you liked it
This is such a great read! In my opinion, no one is ever ready for a baby, but this is a good advice for anyone who is considering taking the big leap into parenthood!
Thank you
Absolutely great post
These questions are important especially the finance
Thanks for sharing thisuseful information
Thank you so much for reading it.
This is such a great post!! You mentioned everything what someone should ask themselves before having a child. Having a child is a blessing but only if you’re actually ready for one!
Thank you
I asked myself these questions all the time before having my baby. Super good advice. 🙂 I am glad that I waited as long as I did-while I don’t think one can ever be totally ready, my husband and I were a lot more prepared than we would have been had we not waited!
Thank you, I am glad you did it your way, with pressure from families, one has to be ready for themselves and nobody else.
These are all definitely good questions! I have quite a long time until I’ll be ready, but it’s definitely a good idea to start thinking about it now.
http://hollyhabeck.com
You have the time girl, all at your time when ready you will know. Thank you for stopping by.
These are good questions to ask yourself if you’re thinking about having a baby. You’ve touched on some things that most people don’t think about. I think everyone jumps to money every time, but I don’t think anyone is ever financially ready for a baby.
Thank you very much, kids don’t need fancy stuff to survive so what you have can be just fine.
This is a fantastic read! Love how youve articulated your thoughts!
Thank you very much.
These are such important questions to keep in mind! I probably should have thought of these before I got pregnant at 19! I learned really quick it was no longer about me.
We sometimes don’t have time to ask ourselves but you did get a blessing at the end of it all.
I never thought about asking question. But this is great read for me because I don’t have kids right now so it’s great time to ask myself these questions.
Hope it helped.
This is an important post and trust me we have been through all this when we planned… I am a new mom and i Know how imp this is 😀
Having a baby is a life changer and a blessing. It comes with great responsibilities. Thanks for reminding us the importance of having a baby
You’re welcome and thank you.
A very helpful post that will truly make you understand all the risks that you have to take once you decide to have a baby. Love how you put up all your thoughts together for your readers. Keep on insipiring!
Thank you so much.
i am asking myself most of this questions… and it is really hard to fight with myself …
Don’t worry you will answer them one day don’t stress yourself.
Yes, definitely, girls should always take time to think about their plans before putting them into action. But, guilty as I am, I had a baby before I knew this was gonna be so hard. However, I embraced positivity and winged it. And now, I am loving motherhood.
Yes, it happens we either have time to ask ourselves or not but at the end of it all we gain a gift to be treasured forever.
Guilty as I am, I had my first baby before I knew that it won’t be that easy to raise a child. But I embraced positivity and with the help of my parents and husband, I am now enjoying every bit of motherhood.
Good on you, women are strong and can handle any situation given unto us.
Having a good support system is key. You need that when you’re bringing a child into this world.
Yes it is really important that’s the only way you will be able to cope.
What an informative article. I know a lot of my pregnant gfs who will appreciate this post!
Thank you very much.
These are definitely important questions to ask! My hubby and I aren’t ready yet but I will refer back to this when we’re closer to being ready.
Take all the time you need, there is no hurry.
Great article! Indeed – the questions are many, but in the end, the only that matters is the baby.
Yes indeed.
These are all great questions to ask yourself and your partner. Although one never really is “ready” per say. You never know what the future will bring once a child is here, but it’s well worth the risk. Children are a precious gift and when you become a parent….you adjust!
Yes, life happens to you.
Raising a baby is not an easy task, it requires so much of effort, compromises and pain and it is women power that can handle it all. It is important to be ready mentally and physically before having one as the responsibilities shoot up after having one. Salute to all the Women who carry this role with so much love selflessly.
Thank you very much for such a beautiful comment, we do owe it all to our mothers.
this is very informative post.. thanks for sharing this with us
Thank you and you’re welcome.
I had so many questions i my head with my son even about how the birthing process would go.
I know it happens and it’s something we all have to go through.
Honestly the only thing that I asked myself before deciding to make a family with my husband was if I could get pregnant. Nothing else.
Nice one, that’s also another question one could ask.
I love this post. Not a mom here, but I keep on thinking about having a kid with my husband (through adoption). But so far, these questions are in my mind to see if we can really both support of having one since we have biggo plans in our married life like traveling like nomads.
-Gerome of G&D Blog
http://www.gdblog.net
Travelling with kids can still work for some so long as you plan it out well and know what to do once the child reaches an age to start school since stability for a child is usually helpful.
All these questions are spot on! Having a baby is no joke it takes planning and commitment to be ready to do whatever it takes to ensure your baby is happy and healthy.
Yes it does.
These are sobering questions to ask before having a child. Having clarity about this will enable a smoother path to parenthood. 👍🏼
All valid points specially the last one. Having a baby is a beautiful but overwhelming feeling. It is better to be prepared.
“Am I financially ready?” is a very important question according to me. Financial stability can make this way more easier 🙂
I don’t think anyone will ever be financially ready for a baby! These are definitely some great questions to ask. Being a parent is such a blessing.
These are all great questions. The biggest thing is if you’re ready mentally because financial and family support can change
You will never be truly financially ready – but to know your finances and where to move things around it very key
I’m glad you wrote a post like this. So many people rush into having a baby without really considering everything involved, and understanding all the responsibilities it entails.
-Jack
Having a baby is a life changing experience, you do need to think if you are up for all possible responsibilities. Great post and I’m sure this post will help young people on this topics.
I’ve asked these questions to myself and to my husband too. We have answered yes and no to some questions but we know that when we get there, we’ll be ready.
You know what? I think stressing about too much will cause you to miss out on the joys of motherhood. My favorite part of having my first baby, was finding ways to figure it all out.
These are all good questions to ask yourself, but at the end of the day, you will just know when you are at that point.
I absolutely love this! I think more people should really be asking those questions to make sure they’re ready for a baby because a child is a huge responsibility.
I think you hit the nail on the head with these questions, more so the one about disabilities. You just never know what your child could develop with time. You need to have an open mind and an open heart.
These are all so true and practical. It is very important to be deliberate about the big decisions in life, so as to avoid regret.
This post brought back some memories. You just never know what cards you’ll be dealt with during your pregnancy. It’s a wonderful, yet scary journey, but so worth it in the end.
Well this is a great post for who are planning to have babies… I wish I got to read this to take many recip before having a baby… But all is well I have 2 babies and things are going well 😊👍🏼
These are great questions. Sometimes babies are unplanned so you do the best you can.
Love this! I know that at this time in my life I am unsure on if I actually want kids or not. A lot of that reason is due to answering some of those questions as ‘no’. But these are great things people should consider when it comes to planning for children
I didn’t ask ANY of these questions before having my son. But I guess on some level, all of these things have been on my mind which is why I haven’t had another child. Even the thought of another one, stresses me out a bit. These are great tips. As much as we think we can prepare for parenthood, we are often gifted with children that throw us for a complete loop. lol
You really nailed the big questions in this post. I especially like the one about childcare. I don’t think that question gets enough consideration by parents to be at times.
I love the questions that you have here. So many people jump in without any forethought.
These sound like some great questions to ask yourself before deciding if you have a child. There is so much you need to think about as its going to be a big change.
I think it’s normal for most moms to be to feel like they are not ready until that sweet little baby arrives. It’s important to be as prepared as you can be and these questions are definitely important to think about!
It is good to take decisions considering all those points. Being prepared to take responsibilities is always helpful.
Great post. I’m not sure there is every a “great” time have a baby in our minds, we always want to be more ready, have more money saved, be a little more prepared. But babies don’t care 🙂 And we always seem to make it work! xo
Having a baby is a huge decision to make. There are so many moving parts and things to consider. Great read.
I know I wasn’t ready. It would have been good to be morem prepared. But the important part is he’s healthy and he’s loved. Nothing else really matters.
These are great tips. Yes for us pregnancy resulted after lot of doctors visit, medicine etc. So at that time we thought only to get baby not worried about rest of things.
I know I have been waiting for the perfect time. It is something we discuss every once in awhile.
This is such a great post and it should be read by anyone who is about to get married or who wants to have a baby.